2003-05-08 01:05:40
two year wedding anniversary, for all you skeptics out there. fil has received the requisite pantone and designer products. so there.
2003-03-22 00:31:07i think there's a secret nazi plan to infiltrate my site.
i checked the stats for the first time in weeks and the hits suddenly ballooned one day and it's all coming from some german guys or something. fil is out doing um, what the hell is he doing. getting coffee. i'll ask him when he comes back.

my job is still as bizarro as ever. pointless, too. but like it's work. we've kindasorta started a monday night drinking club since i go out with a workfriend and then with my managerfriend and they used to be good friends so it was just more sensible this way.

i got neat new glasses and sunglasses for my birthday. and some kinda girly shoes. fun stuff.

various celebrity runins at work, but i tend to not get excited about it. the most fun one was selling james spader and his movie costar a ticket and totally not realizing who they are but having a pleasant chitchat with them anyhow.

i think fil is gonna go down to the protest tomorrow. he likes things like that, though he's not upset about current events. he just wants to see hippies doing dumb things. i'll probably continue to work on my embroidery projects, because i'm exciting and married like that.
2003-02-26 09:40:17i'm so lazy with this thing.
still museuming. this occupies most of my time and reserves of sanity. coming of age issues with discovering what work is like and why it seems so futile. have made two very good work friends, one of them being highly controversial and making some incredibly juvenile coworkers act even more juvenile. i didn't know you're not supposed to go drinking with your boss. poop. people are retards. it makes me more unsure of what i want to be when i grow up. why is vh1 morning jumpstart all commercials?

this show at the museum is fucking madness every single god damned day. it's going much smoother than anticipated, but people don't expect all these security and logistical issues when they're just trying to show up and see a few paintings. it's very tiring having hundreds (thousands really) of angry people asking you to make an exception "just for them" on top of people complaining you're friends with a boss and starting rumors that you actually run the lobby when you really just go about your day trying not to get screamed at by whoever has to pee but can't come into the building for a few hours.

i just need to do more of my own things on the offtime. it's all very difficult because i'm used to being able to resolve my issues, and now i'm in situations where the only thing i can think of is to lay as low as possible. that's quite a challenge when you're one of two people who know how to do a certain thing and ends up being depended on to fix everyone else's shit the vast majority of time. and then people comment on your magical powers of intelligence and mention good things that really shouldn't be filtering down to you and it opens up a pandora's box and you feel conflicted and pulled in a thousand directions at once. see? i am not at work. i should not be stressing about work. i have a dumb job that a polite monkey with a bfa could do, and i should remind myself of that often.

i keep thinking i should do my one very ambitious and perfect bag, then move on to lesser bags or get on top of the painting. embroidery just takes me so very long.
2003-01-01 01:53:13the year of the nub.
well, isn't every year? we are doing lovely. we had a nice quiet christmas which included a lot of sleeping and pretty presents. i received a large silver tibetan necklace from my snoring half, and the cutest hello kitty doll ever made. fil received an ipod from me. he's a happy boy.

work has been very busy lately. i like it that way.

i have been painting a little bit. not enough, but i'm still trying to adjust to this whole working thing. it's weird.

i'm the teensiest bit sloshy, but not nearly enough. i have to work on that. except i have to work tomorrow. not untl noon though.

i just don't have any huge rants. i'm a happy girl and stuff.
2002-12-19 02:21:48like you know, whatever.
do you understand how difficult it is to sit there and do nothing but stare at dimly lit concrete walls for most of the day? no one believes it's actually tiring. like you just kinda forget where you are and start getting up to leave and then you realize you're at work and can't wander around all day. it's still a good job, anyhow. i just need to bring reading material.

i will be appearing on vh1's top 20 countdown for the week selling moma tickets, or so i hear. they were there all day on um, monday? i lose track of days with such a bizarre schedule. i will also be appearing on some peculiar german tv because someone decided today was a good day to visit the store i was selling tickets at. i don't like all this.

and so begins the annual scramble to find fil a present or three hundred. he's very hard. he said to get him a grab bag of crap. so today i brought him a boombox since it's trash day and a russian poster shirt, and we can't seem to wait until christmas. both are successes, but it just means i have to find even more crap for him. hard. we're doing a wee bit of shopping tomorrow before work, i think. he has supposedly spotted a necklace he thinks i'd like, but i've spotted a ton more other jewelry i know i like but is probably much more pricey. christmas is just difficult like that. but things are happy goodness anyhow.

painting a bit. undecided about where to put time. it ends up going to sleep and tv. i think i'll go look for more fabric over he weekend for more bags? maybe? i have no idea how many i need before i can go to a store with them.
2002-12-12 01:20:05sloshy.
i don't think i've ever been as drunk in my life. you know how they get you? when the waiters come around and take away your half finished screwdriver and then you have to go get another one, repeat. so maybe like half a dozen of those and some beer? open bar at the company holiday party was obviously fun. i really love the people i work with. i want to go drinking with them more. it was really actually fun. maybe because it was boys? i think i sold a handbag to a girl in the elevator to pee, but she might be too sloshy to remember my name to call me. getting drunk at your first work christmas party should be a much more widely acknowledged rite of passage, with hallmark cards and such. is there like a flower basket a la ftd or something? only two weeks for kelpfans to buy me holiday goodies, just a friendly reminder.
2002-12-08 03:39:05NEXT STOP YO MAMA'S PUSSY.
we had a nonhanukah really. we did absolutely nothing to observe it, except fil bought me a pink hello kitty cd player and i pretended that it was for the holiday. it matches my pink hello kitty dining set i just unearthed in cleaning.

i had the most traumatic commute to work this week. during the snow, which is really the first time i ever had to be out in it and get somewhere, and i haven't lived here long enough to see more than a teensy bit. so i almost fell down the stairs and had to run back in for my never-used-mom-made-me-buy-boots snowboots. then these private school fucks got a snowday and hijacked my train. or at least they got into the conductor's booth and started screaming, "NEXT STOP YO MAMA'S PUSSY. STEP AWAY FROM THE DOORS BITCH" and mayhem ensued, they took the train out of service, and i had to wait on the snowy platform for another one. then all i wanted later was a peppermint mocha, so i ended up in a fucking lord of the rings premiere snowball fight at the ziegfield. (midtown is still confusing to me, obviously) LICK MY TITS FRODO I LOVE FRODO. nerds. horrible, evil nerds. and i couldn't find a peppermint mocha either. sigh.

the moma is still lovely, though slow due to inclement weather. this woman kept me on the phone for twenty mnutes asking me what fine art is now and if she's an artist. she was like three thousand years old. i'm trying to cope with the boredom, but it's a bit difficult. they changed the videos in the lobby so now it's dimmer and i'm getting good at solitaire. i just wish there were more people around because i feel like i do nothing all day and i like to answer silly tourist questions.

been putting in a little time here and there towards making the studio functional so i can finally paint. i did a bunch tonight and hopefully i can finish tomorrow night, and then i can start painting again. it's been a slowslow process because i can't adjust to one day weekends and then i have to find an appropriate time to do noisy hammering and vaccuuming and such. you know, stuff.

i'm going to be sleepwalking at work tomorrow. better hit the shower.
2002-11-24 04:38:56nubland.
fil is out getting me gel because i mentioned i ran out and i'd have to straighten my hair tomorrow. he got upset enough to run out in thirtysomething degrees at four in the morning so i can be curly tomorrow.

my handbag is *finally* done. it's alright. picture will follow soon, like tomorrow. now i'm on to making a new sketchbook so i can art again. still need to organize the studio in some fashion so it's fit to work in. life is hard.

also must have studio organized so i can turn it into a holiday fantasynubland. i want to get the pink barbie tree fil wanted to buy me last year when we were poor. now we're only mildly poor until we get caught up with bills, i guess. i freak out about these things occasionally. but holidays are always a big deal for me. they're fun. i can't decide if i want a hanukkah or a christmas. i do want presents under a pink barbie tree, though. i also want to email my mother some links to living dead dolls as a "suggestion" for holiday surprises.

fil is currently addicted to the sims. he decided he should take a break from gta for awhile. it's very adorable. he's doing billions of cute things lately. you can gag right here. friday at work we both made people click ratemykitten. isn't that newlywed cheesy? you can gag again if you like. naptime.
2002-11-19 01:41:19stuff. and stuff.
we had dsl issues, so now we have switched to cable. yeay. verizon sucks. fil says everything is itchy. i have been very busy with my new job. i'm enjoying myself. it amazes me what a good group of people it is. STILL sewing this first handbag. lots of experiments gone awry with construction, but i think it should be going a bit smoother for now. okay, that's all.
2002-11-05 03:05:20movin on up.
up 33rd ave to be exact. i know the last babble expressed some sadness about my lovely silly job only being for a little while, but the pink bows and clever packaging will be a world long gone quite soon.

the moma quite unexpectedly called sunday night about a resume sent months ago for something i can't remember, and then i trudged up there on an extended lunch for an "interview." while hitting up the bk dollar menu this evening, cellphone rings and i'm hired. funny how things work out, right? it's a very big change over the course of a day. especially the psychological transition from glorified warehouse job to museum job.

i feel very bad about rushing out of my current job because i love my bosses and the work is great and i'm intimidated by refined professional pursuits after months of searching for work... but i know this is what's best for me, the people also seem really great and almost overly friendly, and it still seems like fun work. only downside i can see is that i have to dress respectably.

and i feel horrible about not being able to give the customary two weeks notice. i always dread quitting, and i haven't had to quit since a pleasant run before. first time for everything, life is like a box of chocolates, etcetc. mum and dad are overjoyed because they can now pretend paying off those parent school loans are worth it, and i know how much my father likes to be able to namedrop. it's just bizarre to actually find any job, and then magically have a coveted one drop in your lap. i'm very grateful for all of it, though. maybe i can finally kick this stupid cold without long rainy cold walks to work where it's even colder. i so need to go to bed now.
2002-10-19 18:41:45it's chilly.
i love my silly job. it's very perfect. too bad it's only for a little while, but it's all good super happy funtimes and such until then. we saw underworld last night, and it's a shame that i had to pee the whole time and my feet were quite unhappy after running around a warehouse all day. but when i forgot about it, it was good, and i'm very glad we went. we were up front at the standard barricade, so i could smell underworld nutsweat and such. fil had fun, and that's important. he's wearing his tshirt today. funny crowd, no one was pretty. fil's favorite new pasttime is chewing on exposed nubs and blowing on them afterwards, which is very pleasant since the radiators haven't kicked in yet and i live under the blanket. i think he took a chunk out of a hip. still working on the handbag project. it's slightly stalled since i have to get through being sleepy after the first week or two of work. that's the update, all goodness.
2002-10-11 06:49:47SALE SALE SALE!!!
nubby holiday job begins next week, for which i am insanely grateful for. sounds free and easy if only they actually give me forty hours. (lee, take note, my bfa was required for a two month stint and i had to compete with three hundred other bfa's) feeling human again, so it's okay to phone now. beginning handbag project and hoping all goes well. first one will be suede and skulls and nubby embroidery. pics to follow soon. scans are secretly online somewhere, see if you can figure it out. it's like an easter egg hunt. winner gets a free nub tshirt, or i can iron BLING BLING on a tshirt of your choice in hot pink letters. if i can feel human for a bit longer, maybe i can get enough bags going to ebay for christmas. pics to follow up on experiment number one shortly.

until then, NUB WEAR ON SALE. because cafepress decided to have an nniversary shindig. new picture in there, though the ringer doesn't want to show it in the index. happy shopping.

new and much more delightfully creepy nub added to the cafepress store. more fun than the last - orange and squishy with no legs.
2002-09-10 17:25:16BUY MY NUBS.
are you discerning enough to love nubby things with smooth shiny crotches? let the office know how much you kick ass with a thingsunder original t-shirt or tote. CLICKY FOR NUB WEAR
2002-09-10 17:24:02
hey what's this thing do linktitle
2002-09-05 11:08:13shafted.
getting a cold for the first time in like a year is the PERFECT compliment to being let go before i could even start work. DIDN'T I FUCKING CALL IT?
2002-09-04 19:26:33whitey's keepin me down.
major brownie points to little bro for not divulging the secret of the treasure trove we know as thingsunder. mum was slightly upset, but dad thinks it's great that we can be siblings and such. *************** i'm supposed to start my dream job on monday. the problem is that dream boss can't put me on until he signs a new dream contract which is supposed to happen yesterday, today, or sometime this week. i haven't heard from him, i left him a message today, and i'm sure i will get shafed in the end. even moreso than usual because it's like a dream job. very hands on interior design where i'd get to paint things and sew things and build furniture, and he would teach me.and even pay me a decentish wage. **************** i have no faith in this actually happening. i've been sending out resumes anyhow. i spend my days trying really hard not to bang my nubby head on things as i send out resumes. there are only two ads reposted throughout the day on various sites, so i can't even really send out that many right now. i got a retard email addressed to "ms. ingrid" saying i have an interview one day and whoever it is will email me next week with time and location. i couldn't figure out what the fuck it was for, but i guess i'll eventually figure it out. it sounds like a drug deal, really. i expect to receive several letters in secret code with a decoder ring anytime now. ************ half a spiderweb just fell on my head. once fil reads this, instead of making baby animal noises at me, he should immediately focus that sympathy into running to starbucks and getting me an almond latte. iced, please. thank you. i wonder if this will work. ***************** i just finished flipping through a hunting catalog and now i'm watching a show about yellowstone. it makes me want to go live in a pickup and hunt deer with a crossbow. let's just ignore that i was too much of a princess to get any enjoyment out of cushy girl scout camp. ************ cute searchstring for here was "squeaky brakes ford tempo." maybe it's a common problem, but i'd like to believe that my legend has been passed down and it was really an effort to find me. **************** in leiu of a job, i think i will start charging sarah's boxes rent. rates will be billed according to square footage. see, you're lucky because they're stacked. i'll be nice and estimate 4 sq ft. i'm paying ummmm, a bit more than two bucks a sq ft. i think they've been here for five months? so that's forty so far at 9.99% (no membership fee). i don't know what that makes it. i should think of a better money making scheme. i wonder if i'll get hits off of "money making scheme" MAKE MONEY NOW. that should generate something. **************** i think i should start submitting pictures of kitties to want ads. just the kitties, nothing else. would you like your kitty featured? ************** oh, i didn't mention last week's interviews. i had the one for aforementioned dream job. i get home from that, and some asshole calls me informing me i passed their fucking voicemail screening test with "the best phone manner yet." he then goes on to tell me that the only time i could come in for an interview was before 7:30 that day. this was at 6:35. no fucking joke. assfuck expected me to run from astoria to manhattan and have time for interview. so i dropped ten bucks for a cab i was lucky to catch. two interviewers (real estate desk monkey again). one left after he had to ask me and the other guy what certain real estate terms i used meant, and they never called me back. which is fine by me. what kind of assfucks do that? like give you a voicemail maze to test your patience and phone manner and then giv eyou an hour to drop what you're doing, get dressed for an interview, and take public transportation to another burough and complete the interview? i just don't understand. ***************** another fun thing lately, more and more ads are ending up being optins for pyramid scheme marketing bullshit. ******** the final week of ai makes me very sad. this show is so obviously slanted towards kelly. i'm very excited about 24 starting again. i have such an empty existence, i know.
2002-08-24 06:50:52hello i want to whine.
i am needing to vent. i had a particularly degrading interview today. here is my story: on arrival, i was asked to fill out an archaic application. how archaic, you ask? it asked for height and weight. HELLO I CAN SUE YOU . then this woman realizes she has a resume with all the pointless information and tells me to stop (but carry it around all ovr the office the whole time). we walk into a conference room, and the first thing she says is, "i see why you're trying to get an administrative job." whee, thank you for insulting everything i've been doing for the past years that you can see on my resume. this is for a real estate firm, by the way, and my resume claims i've been a real estate admin for two years. i lived with one for ten years and i know mls, i think that qualifies. she proceeds to hand me a list of about twenty office keywords and asks me to tell her about them. these include, "file", "phone", "dishwasher." i am baffled. absolutely mystified. "uh, well i'm an entry level phone gal. i have to remember to curl my fingers under the receiver to pick it up, but i'm learning." huh? this as specified knowing word processing. that was it. so the way the list works is she either checks off a word or writes a big NO next to it. my NOs will be counted and the sheet given to someone else later if it makes the check quota cut. is there extra credit? if i bring in a can of soup do i get a free restroom pass? i try to emphasize that i would be interested in a progressive sort of position since i have real estate prospects in my future. this doesn't matter. she hasn't looked at my resume at all. didn't know i have a degree. i can't figure out why someone would have called me then. the school part explains the lack of hardcore work history afterall. she decides she can train me in dishwashing and setting up lunch for the dawdling old partners if i'm insure, so i end up with three NOs, which beats the average of six. we take an office tour. a big stink ensues over filing. can i lift those heavy boxes on top of the cabinets? uh, i think so. "you're a big girl blahblah (cutoff)" "excuse me?" "can you lift the files? you have to tell me now or i can't give you a job." "give me a box and i'll be happy to see if i can lift it." "NONO YOU DO NOT LIFT THE FILES YOU MUST GET UP ON A STEP AND PUT A FILE IN THE BOXES ON TOP OF THE CABINET" "i think i can handle that. would you like me to show you?" "NONONO CAN YOU PUT THE FILES IN THE FILE?" sorry, i'm not fluent in retard? after assuring her i can put a file in a file in a box on top of files, this seems to confirm to her that i would like the job. i must remove my bag from the conference room now. an arab couple comes in and glares at the shuffling jewish girl, not moving out of the way for me to reach the bag after saying excuse me and explaining. we go to her office. she sees that my minimum salary is a certain amount and decides that would be my salary. i try to explain to her that is my bare minimum considering other criteria are met, and she just figures their ten an hour is eight hundred more a year so i should be elated. no, that is my below market value for a job i like and will advance in. whatever. i pop the question. i ask her if seeking a real estate license would benefit me in this position, since this is a real estate something. she looks way confused and insulted i'd ask about something benefiting me. so i try to explain that in some cases seeking further education such as this allows me to take on more responsibilities and advance. this is a way critical issue in real estate. she says flat out no. tells me not to do it. she reminds me i have three NOs and my NO paper will be given to someone else for formal NO decision making, and not to expect to hear anything or contact them because they are looking for the optimal number of NOs and though my NO total is wonderful now, it may not be a few interviews later. so here is a big FUCK YOU to this absolute bullshit. never have i missed the gay, "what do you see yourself doing in five years?" bullshit question so much. instead of inquiring as to what kind of real estate practices i am familiar with, i am asked how i would file their papers in their system i know nothing about. or maybe she wanted a philosophical treatise on the zen of putting a sheet of paper in a file, completing the whole, how the tab is the yin to the cardstock's yang. what the fuck. had i the opportunity or anyone cared, i could have mentioned that though i have never set out lunches in conference rooms, i am familiar with investment and residential real estate buying, selling, and closing procedures. that i know about different kinds of real estate investments and their common returns, and those procedures. i know plenty of real estate terminology. i know the fucking legal issues surrounding real estate and property management better than anything else. NO PLEASE DESCRIBE THE WORD PHONE. screw you. you need a retard office monkey who can be subservient to senile old men with the minimum number of NOs. she was upset because i did not know her obscure filing program that she said was dead simple, but if she bothered to read my resume and see that i can stumble around successfully in mac, ms, linux, and unix would she have understood? even that tiny retard sentence in my computer skills should relay i can figure out how to open a fucking window and close it when i'm done. i want to send her a tastefully condescending letter thanking her for time but saying i would not dare touch a job like that even in a dead job market. i want to send these old farts videos detailing women's right advances since zoot suits became unfashionable, and inform them of eoe practices. i have never felt compelled to care that my gender may me mistreated, but give me a fucking break. the beautiful part of this is that i can have another wonderfully dehumanizing foray into begging for employment early next week. can i get a woot woot? it's hammer time. gay rap moment. ice ice baby. PLEASE POP A COMMENT IN THE DOODLY REQUEST and tell me if i should send that delightfully subtly scathing critique of their interviewing practices to save a shred of my dignity.
2002-07-05 18:15:57searchstring winner for the day: GIRLS TAMPONS CAM
do you really want a cam with girls and tampons? why why why? are my fans so indiscriminate with their affections? ***** this is what fil said to an easily nauseated friend about our holiday, "we slept in til about 4 pm, hung around house making baby animal noises at each other and the tv, then went on roof to watch fireworks." wheeee. ***** he and his mother are trying to get me to visit faraway places on another continent, i am trying to get fil to take a weekend in vegas with me, and all i end up with is a mint chip sundae. which is really pretty alright. his birthday is coming up soon and gift suggestions are welcome. just slip it in the doodly request. he likes video games and physics and gets upset when i draw faces on his oranges because it makes him sad to eat them. ***** burp ***** i am feeling the need to delve into artiness again, but i'm thinking kitschy mexican. some classic ingrid color pencil perhaps. ***** i just had a sundae. it rocked. ***** i think we're going to go movie tonight. i really have to get out more. ***** i don't know if i have a pencil sharpener around to do color pencil. ***** lala la. *****
2002-07-04 02:34:23i am a puddle.
it is so warm. it's truly amazing. what is more amazing is that fil actually seems to be adjusting to the heat. i am perpetually dripping in the salty goo that kelp supposedly enjoys. someone really needs to love me enough to scan all the loteria cards and send it to me. it is so warm. you know, here i was thinking i'm not sending enough resumes out and then you realize that these ads are up forever and at this point, i think i've gotten them all. got an interview coming up for a job i don't really want, but i think that's how this stuff is supposed to work. one a week is sad. i think. according to everyone else, it's not. i read an awful lot of dumb news all day. i'm very caught up in american idol. i don't know who i want to win. i think kelly because she really reminds me of tim's kelly. wasn't that her name? they look alike. have i mentioned how insane this heat is? i think we're going to watch fireworks from the roof tomorrow. i'm deeply saddened that i can't even have sparklers. i love sparklers. they're pretty. my nails are sparkly. and red. i feel like a big weenie letting the heat (have i mentioned the heat?) affect me so, but it is absolutely oppressive. so incredible. it makes me even more sleepy than usual. we need to be friends with another couple with a backyard who wants to bbq tomorrow. i don't think that's going o happen in the next 18 hours. when are the fireworks tomorrow? i think fil wants to go on a bridge and look at them, but that sounds veryvery warm. i'm sleepy.
2002-06-26 13:35:23sky go boooooom
thundery stuff happening outside. it's so incredibly warm today. i wore a girlsuit for an interview yesterday and it was baking. we miss dry heat. well, central air. why doesn't new york have central air? it just feels like new york is slowly baking. our a/c is having issues lately. i can't run it on the actual a/c, so it's just on fan but that helps a lot. it's also amazingly cheaper than real a/c. *** some asshole came into my favorite bodega this morning yelling at the clerk about an open space in guatanemo. and there were other people just being assholes this morning everywhere. it makes me want to run around hugging people at mcdonald's. and then the forementioned idiot started loudly bitching about how martha stewart made a hundred million yesterday (looking at a paper headline). didn't she lose 100 mil yesterday? **** fil is at work doing important work things. thus, i am im'ing him with "sky go BOOOOOOOOOOOOm" and "narf". *** one of my latest "i want to be a blahblah" when i grow up schemes has me thinking i want to be a carpenter. have i mentioned that already? i found out how to get an apprenticeship today. the carpenter's union has some weird lottery for it in the fall and a little "i want to be a carpenter" school. so if i'm a register jockey come august, i think i'll try that out. the guy i spoke to was all nice and excited since i was a girl and decided art school careers aren't as fun as uh, carpentry. *** although i did have another gallery interview yesterday. this one, i must say i was guilty of overconfidence. i go on so many of these, you would think one would pan out eventually. why interview someone when thieir resume clearly states they're underqualified for something? *** and now it is most definitely raining. i'm supposed to go to annie's sva opening tonight. hopefully i will make it. i love ann. she said she has a phonestalker and she's all freaked out thinking she's going to die. did i mentioned my stalker from the other day? we went to see lilo & stitch, which rocks hardcore by the way, and everyone should see it. so we got home and i went to pick up snacks for us around four in the morning and this sleazy asshole started following me everywhere, and then he'd send bums in whatever store to follow me around. i had to call fil to come rescue me. i think i already mentioned that. okay, no i didn't. so yah, that was my stalker experience. i just chatted with fil's exboss since i am now housesecretary. i figure if i'm nice to lots of people they'll give me gobs of money. or i'm trying to see if anyone can find me work, anyway. nah, he's a nice guy. and i'm in a phonechattychat mood at the moment. yeayme. hohum. i like typing to myself. my little plants are rockin it on the windowsill.
2002-06-19 18:11:25i remembered to water my plants.
i am so sleepy. i'm trying really hard to make my schedule normal again. * i've been playing an awfulawful lot of ssx tricky. i'm trying to see how many knockdowns i can get on garibaldi playing luther. so far, i have it up to 19. i'm feeling kinda lost with all my favorite shows gone now. we've been watching an awful lot of invader zim. fil seems to think he's a tiny green cartoon alien now, and of course of i'm the tiny space robot puppy. fil has added to our cheesy vocabulary, and i think it's very zim inspired. here are his latest nuggets: 1) meattooth - like a sugartooth, but for meat. 2) fruitfoam - this apparently means watermelon. 3) snackuum - because i eat his cookies and drink his soda while he's at work all day. 4) "i eat food and have thumbs" - direct quote from show. note: words should be pronounced in a high pitched grunty yelly kinda thing. watch more nickelodeon, i guess. yes, we appear to still be in the cheesy newlywed stage. i swear i am going to start painting again soon. i just kinda need to figure out what i want to do. i got this kewpie doll at a streetfair a month ago with the intention of basing little characters on it because my nubby people aren't quite nubby enough. i want to start a new series of scriptural things but i've been trying to decide exactly what, because i need to do something different. and then i have this lovely new canvas sketchbook i made a few weeks ago that has gone untouched. i think i should start with that. yah, i think so. i am so incredibly sleepy. i wonder if fil will be irked by my vocab lesson. i'm supposedly a pixiegoth anyway. i am so incredibly sleepy. i sent out resumes today. aren't i wonderful? it really sucks ass. i think i really should just give up on a "real" job and look for retail already. though that's tough here too. i have no idea. i should call back friends who keep leaving messages, but i don't really feel like it. i'm pretty comfortable in my routine of ps2, resumes, books, sleep. i need to go pick up his drycleaning now. and maybe forage for breakfast.
2002-06-13 15:27:07lazy days.
hello, i do nothing all day. just reading. sending out a few resumes here and there, just a teensy fraction of what i should be doing. i just haven't been all that enthusiastic about joining the workforce. the time will soon grow near where the parental handouts will stop, so i'll be needing employment by the end of the summer. i look at the ads, but it's really all financial stuff or things i'm sorely lacking in experience for. i'd bitch about needing five years of experience filing for an entry level nosepicker position, but i think i've already said it all here awhile ago. i can't really figure out what i want to do, anyway. well, i have rough ideas, but i think it depends much more on whatever i'm lucky enough to get hired for within my preferences. i had an interview today for a job i'd actually kinda like, but i'm beyond really getting my hopes up about anything i interview for and i just prefer to be indifferent outside of the allotted interview time. i'd temp if i were older and more polished, but i know i'd be really horribly bad at it. i don't know. i guess next week i'll start really putting some effort into it. * i had dinner with annie and her fiance and mormons this past weekend. it was fun. everyone was playacting and trying to be adults, and it was her cooking debut. i was evil and tricked the mormons into sinful coffee consumption by bringing tiramisu. or i realized after i bought it that i shouldn't have, and i asked everyone if it was okay, and then they realized later. * i know octavius reads this occasionally, so whenever you get around to this bit, congrats to you and julia on your show. *
2002-04-30 23:04:45"it's your change of life."
you would think this refers to menopause, but no, this is how my father describes my graduating from college. he's not good with those rites of passage things. he always says these super painfully cheesy hallmark phrases that make me squirm. * they're visiting in two weeks for graduation. i'm not as stressed as i should be, i think. but that's a-okay. * i have busted ass trying to get arty things done for reviews, and they didn't bother looking at them because they talked about my show instead. it's up until saturday at visual arts gallery at 137 wooster between houston and prince. soho and stuff. please buy things and make me rich. i'm too lazy tto figure out how to put a link in so you can cut and paste if you want a blurb and photo. http://www.schoolofvisualarts.edu/07.News/MuseumGalleries/Archive/2002StudentGalleryShows/VisualArtsGallery/StructuralDark/Structral.html
2002-03-15 21:52:46fictional, comedic drama.
is what m brother says this would be if he didn't know me. i promised to make a note of it. i'm sure he really cares. * i had a birthday a few days ago. fil got me a fun handbag that i wanted. i've been saying it has a lobster embroidered on it, but i just noticed it has no claws so it's a shrimp. not as glamorous, but tastier. we ate at some snotty little italy restaraunt. ron also took me out for an italian lunch. birthday report concluded. * looking for work, not finding any. * i have this retard scheme for extra cash, but mostly fun. i have decided i want to make handbags, due to schoolkids saying the'd pay for my paintings on clothing or something. i don't know how to navigate that whole fashion thing, so i think i can just circumvent the style and workmanship issue with accessories. well, it will still include workmanship, but it's easier to conceive of ways to make objects sturdy moreso than clothes that need to move with the body. and look alright. so the plan is to get some done for open studio in may, then try finding some store to carry them. and put them on here whenever we get around to redoing the site to include portfolio stuff. i think it could work to some degree. * i spent a few hours today attempting to get somewhere with the savage love contest. you know, the column. look at it this week and ry to figure out where the excerpts are from, and then tell me. it's fucking hard. the closest thing i found was a site saying, "this contest is fucking hard." to make my point. * okay, that's it. * oh wait. another birthday present... we got teens venus fly traps in teensy little pots. they're very adorable and we treat them like pets. *
2002-02-19 18:31:37i am a lazy horrible evil horrible awful web diarist.
yesyesyes, i should really update this on a daily basis. i haven't spent a whole weekday at home in a longass time and it is so incredibly boring. i'm supposed to be somewhere but i just didn't feel like going anywhere today. i got caught up typing cover letters and eating sugary things. i think two "GIANT DELICIOUS" (that's what it says on the cup) coffees every morning is partially contributing to my nervousness during daylight and i should knock it down to one before i leave the house everyday. nothing new or exciting. i recently discovered the little toe on my left foot is horribly deformed, and fil and i have proceeded to beat the subject to death. alright, so not horribly deformed, just half the size of the other little toe. i never noticed it before. i was kinda amazed how fil can constantly make fun of my nubby limbs and not throw in a crack about a deformed toe and then i'd like get it. my pyjama/apartment pants hae a rip in the knee. it's the first pair of pants that's ever happened to, and i feel a certain sense of pride in it. it would have come in handy way back when i loved nirvana and wanted everyone to know. fil is bringing me pixie magic fairy princess wands when he comes home. i swear i'm not a pixie goth. i've run out of people to cyberstalk. no one is anywhere on the web anymore. is it passe to talk about "things on the web" like that? my apartment makes lot of weird scary noises. apartment building really should be soundproofed. the people upstairs are yelling at each other in some weird language and now someone burped really loud.
2002-01-09 21:56:07i wake up kinda early.
and do nothing the rest of the day. but i try to feed fil before i ship him off to work in the morning. * so i'll be digging in to the last semester beginning next week. i'm pretty fucking apprehensive about it all. i don't know about grad school. it's painful being financially dependent on my parents for my share of things. but uh, aside from that... the usual uncertainty about what to do with my paintings. pink unicorns or um, other things? and i'm not too sure about doing things just in boxesfor right now. making some as "paintings" would probably be a good idea. i think i was considering making things more southwest, but then i got all obsessed with this babylon idea and everything looks all near east. i don't know, i'm watching south park.
2001-12-16 03:33:23oh shit, one semester left.
over the past week, i've come to this huge revelation that six months from now i won't be in school anymore. art school has been this daily part of my life for six months. sure it's been a love/hate kinda thing. and i'm just deeply saddened to think that, although i'll still be doing art, chances are nobody is going to see it. and art won't be the focus of my everyday life. i'll be doing something else all day trying to squeeze artiness in elsewhere. i don't like to think i'll be leaving new york with my dreams unfulfilled. i want so badly to be somebody and do great things, and hanging around at school it always seems a possibility. so what happens to me when i'm out of that? it just seems that there's a lot left to do in the next six months, that i shouldn't take that time for granted.
2001-12-06 03:56:09retaliation in the form of absence.
i will not be attending class tomorrow in protest of the retard bullshit where he sat us in a dark room for an hour and a half alone with a computer and told us to "take turns surfing the web. do you all know how to follow links? you know how to surf, right?" etcetc. * we recently had a houseguest who decided to pay off her debts by cleaning our apartment. neat, huh? * bfa reviews coming up next week, so i've been trying to put everything together. i painted my studio pink with shiny green stars. kids were putting up sheet rock for perfect walls, so it's not like i went all out. i just have to finish getting all my shit together to put in it. it's a lot of effort and hot glue. open studios are after that and i don't think anyone will show up for the building mine is in since there's not much there and it's not the school building, but it's still a good excuse to put forth some effort. my apologies for the lack of wit. i'm kinda hungry and i want fil to go get me cookies. *
2001-11-29 06:50:39i built a teensy crackhouse.
okay, so it's more like a pet bed vegas style but whatever. i got this idea to make dioramas and put painted pieces in them rather than submit to the traditional boring painting thing. i think it definitely suits me better. or perhaps i'm speaking too soon because i need to finish the pieces and put them in and everything. i really should post pictures for the three people who visit this page and wonder what the hell i'm talking about. just know that this particular project involved a lot of cardboardy stuff, two bags of fabric stuffing, 30 bucks of fabric, 30 glue sticks, and six hours. i'm just really kinda proud of myself. like i'll send a day doing an arty thing and then i'll just look at it wondering how i got a heap of foamcore and fabric scraps to do something pleasant. and now i need to figure out presentation. that's going to kinda be a bitch. um, yah, this is always interesting since nobody ever sees this stuff. *
2001-11-26 04:14:14eee.
i *heart* fil. i varnished stuff. lalaa.
2001-11-25 00:37:15i amtraked a bunch.
so we were in the faraway land of pittsburgh for awhile. got grilled by the parents for a day, but other than that we had fun. party train down there. everyone was drinking. puking in the bathroom. begging for money to buy the loudmouth ghetto harvard girl drinks so she'll give it up, which she didn't, so our contribution went to waste. we had a stopover in dc and visited the air & space and then the hirschhorn museums. i got a shirt commemorating bush's innauguration. went to the mall on friday. my brother went all sorts of nuts since we took him out of his apartment and gave him a ton of sugar. i ate an awful lot of shrimp. lots of good time with fil. fil had lots of goodish time with my brother. my parents had lots of good time nagging. i think it was a fairly successful excursion. *
2001-11-21 01:09:53where the fuck is nuie?
is that a country? because someone from there visited my site. confused. * i was going to nap but now i'm all awakish and anxious about dealing with the parents. we leave here at the asscrack of dawn and all. * picked up a fun photo book put out by taschen and unicef called 1000 families. check it out. * also picked up an actual coat. my first that isn't thrift store faux fur. it's just a real coat. because i freeze every winter and i want to not look too amazingly scrubby for the parents, but it's neat. i swear. unfortunately, i couldn't find anything long in petite so that's going to be a problem when it rains or snows. guess i should get that fixed. it's dark and the monitor is dimmed so typing is hard.
2001-11-19 00:37:46wheeeeee i do nothing all day.
yah, basically. almost done with a painting, starting another one. fun stuff. fil really likes it. maybe because it's of him? * i found my keys. * i don't really have much of anyhing to write about.
2001-11-17 01:00:34i forget what day it is.
i had intended to take a short nap, but that's never the way things work out. i don't think fil really wanted to take a nap at all, but then he gets sucked in by the siren song of cozy and it's impossible to wake him up again. i think sitting ont he bed for more than ten minutes dooms him and he's just completely lost if i fall asleep on him. this is married life. * i got my existentialism midterm back today. he made a big production of it and told us how one year he got his finger chopped off a half hour before giving the test over the phone. my friend got like part of an a-, but that's the highest i know of and he flunked an awful lot of kids. i made out with a b. somehow. he's the first teacher who liked my writing "style" and said it's suave and had a history. he's also the first college professor i've had that's asked us not to use "i" in an essay, so good for him. the final is going to be a huge bitch. i think it's going to be the first time i'll ever have to work for an a. * i talk about school an awful lot, don't i? * i think i lost my keys. although i should have heard them fall out of my pocket, so who knows. * enamel painting experiment going pretty well so far. i'm trying to be conscious of the approaching end of the fall semester. the last few weeks always gets knocked off for critiques and then no one ever knows exactly when that's supposed to happen. so much should i hypothetically be doing. *
2001-11-15 23:43:38art school diaries entry #435361.
so class today was extremely painful. field trip to um, let us leave the institution unnamed. we went to see a "new media" show, and oh dear god. so fucking awful. my professor had pieces in it which were just plain bad. there was a bad film projection that was kinda like if you were to take a little journey inside a bad photoschop jumble of lines and occasionally flashed an error message. but to listen to the guest curator and my professor speak. ow. now i don't know an awful lot about computers, but i'm reasonably aware and haven't been living under a little luddite rock. who the fuck talks about open source as being duchampian? it's just so tiring dragging myself through this weekly where i just want to scream at the professor that everyone has got it all wrong and the art community REALLY needs to pay attention to what the web and programming community is doing. i'm sorry, but a webcam of a church in germany projected on a wall is not revolutionary. is my webcam a powerful statement about rejecting the traditional notion of the painting? i mean, well, sure it could be, but it should in no way be heralded as BRAND SPANKIN NEW and the first time it's been done. bad painters are just completely enamored with the idea that they can use their little polka dotted imacs and make sommething all the other bad painters will think is revolutionary. (i have the blue dalmation imac, btw) but i think it's this very basic idea that you need to learn the fundamentals before you should fuck around with the rules. the webcam guy i mentioned made it sound like putting a webcam online is this collaboration between einstein's ghost and nasa. god forbid any of these painterly fucks should simply use the web and keep the medium's integrity before they do anything else. like just do something specific to that rather than attempting to apply it. because now we end up with fucking webcams of a trash ecosystem in an otherwise good art institution and WHY? designers really need to break into the art community and pimp what they do, because it's so much more important and so much better than what's going on now in the butchered gallery version of the genre. do galleries and museums just feel "design" is too base? well, okay, so obviously yes in most cases, but if you're going to have a gallery that exists solely for new media, why not pay attention to what's going on with it and know how to correctly define "open source" since you're going to have a show about it? and i'll stop before i get too redundant. * absent friend still did not show up fo class, and i asked sign in friends to not sign her in anymore because they feel the same way anyhow. maybe it's wrong for me to interfere, but i think you need to be held accountable if you attend two sessions of a course in a semester. it just really cheapens my diploma. why not just drop out and spare the guilt and tuition fee. she'll probably read this eventually, but it's so incredibly infuriating. * i'm quite apprehensive about my thanksgiving plans. it's one thing for me to drag myself on a longass train ride to pittsburgh to deal with my parents, but i feel bad dragging fil along too. we're staying with my brother and i haven't seen him in a year. my parents say he's changed, and he's always been a difficult kid so i don't know what to expect. i'd like to actually be friends, but he very much resents the idea of being obligated to deal with a family of people he didn't choose. i've always been very good to him regardless of the unfound resentment, but i honestly don't know what to expect when i hear he's gone from programmer kid to pothead drinking social (normal) kid. so i hope all will go well. * and um, can't think of anything else.
2001-11-15 01:11:47i like blurry pictures.
no school wednesday, so i just sit around. a lot of napping involved. it's that season. * i picked up some more enamel, so i really need to get on making something with it. * i'm in dire need of little crackhead christmas decorations. you know what happens when you're raised by neurotic jews who think god will smite your elder arty child for having a tiny harmless christmas tree? you become desperate to rebel and volunteer to decorate everyone's tree for them. which usually worked out pretty well because the spoiled christian kids never wanted to decorate theirs. the parents were always confused because acording to them, jews worship the devil and sacrifice goats and drink baby blood on christmas. thus, i am determined to have my crackhead christmas. damn it. so i will scurry down to the dollar stores on my cloven hooves and hopefully find some cheesy festive things sometime soon. * what the hell is on my tv. i think we're going to break down and get cable. * there's an awful lots of cans of whip cream on and around the bed. you'd think i'm kinky like that but i think we're just pretending that someone else will put away the groceries. *
2001-11-13 22:22:57artywhat?
today my studio teacher suggested i work on something else and experiment because the current paintings i'm doing are uh... what the hell did she say. they are unique and bizarre and interesting and extremely well done but she can't say anything else about them except she'd maybe like to see them get more complex but she thinks i could just do them at home without school and they'd get along fine so why don't i do something else we can actually discuss? so basically she can't tell me how to improve something that's already good, and i must do something else she can pick at. okay, this class is three credits and that equates to how much money? but i guess it's just a good excuse to work on something else, i guess? i bitched about wanting to. so i bought a bunch of teensy bottles of enamel and we'll see how that works out for me. * fil just told me that he has no problem buying me tampons but he refuses to buy one of the cute dolls from monsters that's sitting at blockbuster because i told my mother i'd buy it for her. *sigh* * hairy man legs on my tv. *
2001-11-12 04:51:34arting.
i'm just arting today. that's it, really. * i am soooo incredibly glad fox sunday night is normal again. * fil and i spent entirely too much time in bed just mumbling, "cozy." * it's just a sunday.
2001-11-10 02:20:31i am so tired.
long day of attempting to study, some reading, then the most serious midterm i have ever taken. then i hung out with some class kids who all had the self-righteousness i spoke of previously and listened to them interrupt each other for six hours. and extoll the virtues of hard drugs. and then question that in wank wank existentialist terminology, except it was sarte wankwank as opposed to camus style wankwank like high school. and with much more alcohol. the moral of the story is be careful of what you ask for. no, actually, it was alright. i was just too tired to leave and deal with a cold sleepwalk to the subway. they're good kids. *
2001-11-09 01:28:08artifufuness.
procrastinating. don't wanna study for the existentialism midterm tomorrow. he gave us the essay questions, so if i'm smart i'll bother to figure them out beforehand. there was a little study get together this evening which i chose to forego in favor of curling up with fil. * i don't understand my "art history seminar" class. i get absolutely nothing out of it. i can't figure out if the teacher is gay.* school annoyance for the day: i have a friend who doesn't go to class very much. admittedly, i miss a fair bit but keep it well within the acceptable limits. so our other friend keeps signing her in on the attendance sheet. i commute for longer than i spend in that waste of an hour and fifteen minutes of a class, and being that's it's so short and requires absolutely no participation other than staying marginally awake... it's just painful to watch someone get away with it year afer year when they could be doing a lot more with themselves. i just wonder when the reality check will come into play, or if it ever will. probably not. and then the other sign-in friend ATE ONIONS FOR THE ENTIRE CLASS. tiny crowded room with poor ventilation, and she's eating fucking onions. ONIONS. does anyone really and truly enjoy eating raw onions, anyway? are vegans so desperate? * i tagged up this url in my school studio and i wodner if anyone will stumble onto this and hate me. more, anyway. but it's not my fault. i just point out episodes of people being incosiderate. it's like my duty or something. * for my thesis, i've been slowly making these little biblical shrinky dink looking things in velvet and i'm tiring of it a bit. but hey, it's held my attention for longer than past projects. i wonder if i can stop at semster's end and just make a whole new thesis project and just end up with two. i'm itching to do incredibly laquered vegas vacation paintings of me and my cuter half. i was inspired by waking life, since it's similar in some parts to how i paint. my high school best friends had a large series of "a year in our life" after they got married, and it's just a really fucking good idea when you're young and weird and living someplace interesting like vegas and then you get pregnant in high school and things like that. like it's this 17 year old arty "alternative" girl holding a a postive ept with the greatest expression on her face that's all almost kinda embarassment and pride. just really good stuff. and painted extremely well. and i should kinda steal the premise. maybe i should call them sometime, but i have no idea what to say after so long. * lately i've really been missing having an arty clique. i find it very hard to really get along with people here, even after three years. i want friends who have i guess a little more self confidence? yah, i guess that's the big difference between the vegas friends and the new york friends. everyone was so much more self righteous, and i can't really attribute it to a greater youthfulness. well, that kinda too. i don't know. not everyone needs a therapist. why can't anyone just have an opinion without discrediting it at the same time? or just kinda be comfortable with their lives. if you're going to be a major pothead or a huge wino, why not just embrace it, extoll all it's virtues to anyone who will listen, and then make up wanky excuses about how it betters your life? not that i advocate it, but i tire of everyone having substance abuse issues and being so down on themselves for it and never really fixing it or planning to. like just be comfortable with your vices at that point. * so i'm just mulling over my priorities like that as the time for grad school apps grows near. i can't figure out where i want to end up. vegas is looking more and more attractive. though then i have parents again and i know a lot of people already in that i've already gone hrough them kind of way. i'm just split on how good it would be for me professionally. i think when i'm down there over the holidays i should stop in and try to talk to the department chair or something. * you would think i'd save all this for an internal dialogue rather than throwing it up on here, right?
my car is going to charity tonight. THANKS MOM. for those of you familiar with the splendor of its squealing brakes, the one working tail light, the antisemitic scribbles in crumbling paint, the junior mints melted into the passenger seat, the glove compartment that will never stay closed, the wobbly rearview mirror, the emergency brake that comes to life everytime the car accelerates, the ac that blows hot air, the driver's seat that slides back and forth with bend of the road, and that little sunshade mirror thingie that flips down and hits me in the head... let us now observe a moment of silence. i think the hungry children would rather get a sandwich. *
2001-11-06 23:53:49shit. i should have voted.
such incredibly inconsiderate kids in my studio class today. one end, kids smoking pot. that's not that bad, but there were kids imported from the fourth floor studios in another school building to do it, and those are the obnoxious, "this painting is about my alienation while i watched rats fight in the subway and you can tell because of that brown drip," sort of art students. you know? other end, lots of running around and shrill giggling. so many radios. i end up listening to crass, nin, and mariachi at the same time. and what the fuck is up with using envirotex indoors with other people around? it's highly toxic and requires a heavy duty industrial gas mask even outside. and why use it to glue hair onto something? if i'm going to end up with lung cancer and brain damage, it should at least be for a good painting. * so i bough radio shack speakers to plug into the minidisc. the plan was to play p5's girl from ipanema for a few hours as my thanks to the radio kids, but the fucking things don't work. very sad. * sniffle. * i saw britney on the way home. she has so much security. it's fucking incredible. half the nypd is on 21st st. * at this time, i'd like to express my utmost gratitude to the bathroom cleaning pixie. the tub is blinding. * pouncycakes, i am working on granting your doodly request. * i am not fucking gothic. * i am extremely anxious to see how the mayoral race pans out. i like mike. mike will help to insure that i have a job one day. green will have to pander to his party to insure that my neighbor who sits on the "stoop" with her grandmother and assorted children at 3 am speaking only spanish will have my hypothetical future job. i think the choice is clear. *
2001-11-04 23:34:11i think i should get cable.
yankees lose. watching arizona jump up and down squealing like little girls actually kinda made me sad. does that mean i'm into fandom or new york or something now? it just seemed a sad little reminder of how the city is fading. green will end up mayor. he just reminds me of a ferret. earthquake last week epicenter MY NEIGHBORHOOD. people strolling in gas masks. old women praying on the subways. rats. winter. it doesn't have the splendor of when i first got here, but i guess that would inevitably happen the longer i'm living here. hopefully my hypothetical future career will be worth it. i guess it all sounds very angsty and gothic. it's just very difficult to sit through the i *heart* ny more than ever campaign. because, well, i certainly don't. my skyrocketing price of living is worth worrying whether or not the mysterious powder on my sleeve from the train is lethal? * family movie night saturday was waking life. fil has been raving about it since he saw it the previous day, so i thought i'd see what all that was about. animation is certainly worth the ticket price, and if you don't get caught up in the wankwank discussions i so often do you'll probably enjoy it. * what is my with my aversion to painting? * i asked fil what else i should babble about, and he says the decreasing quality of net art. short and sweet, it's still in its infant stage and will probably never get over itself. * i don't know where all these napkins came from. * i had the best shrimp scampi in new york. everyplace i've tried it here has given me some weak garlic lemon oil bullshit, but i highly recommend the last stop cafe if you ever find yourself way the fuck out in astoria. * my parents have officially cleaned out my room. they made it into um, i have no idea really. i think it's just another playroom for dad now. to compensate, my mother has been buying dolls that look like me when i was a teensy ice princess. * i'm really curious to see what happens with ceiling repair tomorrow. bathroom ceilings routinely collapse here. i think it's kinda like a housewarming thing. so we have an incredibly incompetent repairman who does't seem to understand you can't plaster up a gaping hole. maybe i should webcam it. special edition cd-rom? * i guess i should really tend to these paintings now.
2001-11-03 04:14:42throwness into my ownmost possibilities. (wank wank)
how many days until i finally get to the met? "maybe tomorrow." because i won't be sleeping until sundown. * if you're not attending school, i'd like to let you know you're missing tittillating (teehee) enactments of sartre plays by esl art students. punctuated by the professor yelling ISRAELI RADIO THEATRE. mom and dad would agree my student loans are worth it. * i went for coffee with some kids from class, and i have to say i *completely* missed that this girl was trying to get on this boy. i really don't notice people flirting anymore, because as an old wrinkled married hag i don't think about how to attract and tame dick. you know? i think i just don't notice people so much anymore in general. * no bitching about the subways today. * family movie night, but out of the apartment. fil and i saw monsters, inc. the short before it has adorable squeaky noises. it was a very cute movie (not cheesy, just cute), and the little girl is me circa 1982. because i'm the ice princess now. okay, so i still squeak and yelp and clamp onto arms and um, nevermind. * fine, i'm a big cheeseball. christ. my site is PINK. with BEARS. * how the fuck am i supposed to notice people flirting when they use intellectual wank wank sartre terms like facticity and bad faith? * bedtime.